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Three
men were drinking
at a bar -- a
doctor, an
attorney and a
biker. As the
doctor was
drinking his white
wine he said,
"For her
birthday, I'm
going to buy my
wife a fur coat
and a diamond
ring. This way, if
she doesn't like
the fur coat she
will still love me
because she got a
diamond
ring." As the
attorney was
drinking his
martini he said,
"For my
wife's birthday,
I'm going to buy
her a designer
dress and a gold
bracelet. This
way, if she
doesn't like the
dress she will
still love me
because she got
the gold
bracelet." As
the biker was
drinking his shots
of whiskey he
said, "I'm
going to buy my
wife a T-shirt and
a vibrator. This
way, if she
doesn't like the
T-shirt she can go
fuck
herself!"
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Three
guys were sitting
in a biker bar.
A
man came in, he
was already drunk,
sat down at the
bar and ordered a
drink.
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The
man looked around
and saw the 3 big
men sitting at a
corner table. He
got up, staggered
to the table,
leaned over,
looked the biggest
one in the face
and said, "I
went by your
grandma's house
and I saw her in
the hallway, buck
naked. Man, she is
fine!"
.
The
biker looked at
him and didn't say
a word.
His
buddies were
confused, because
he was a bad ass,
and would fight at
he drop of a hat.
The drunk leaned
on the table again
and said, "I
got it on with
your grandma and
she is good, the
best I ever
had!"
.
The
biker still said
nothing. His
buddies were
starting to get
mad.
.
The
drunk leaned on
the table again
and said,
"I'll tell
you something else
boy, your grandma
liked it!"
.
The
biker stood up,
took the drunk by
the shoulder and
said, "Damn
it, grandpa,
you're drunk. Go
home!"
A
timid little man
ventured into a biker
bar in the Bronx
and, upon clearing his
throat, asked, "Um,
err, which of you
gentlemen owns the
Doberman tied to the
parking meter
outside?"
A
giant of a man wearing
biker leathers with his
body hair growing out of
the seams turned slowly
on his stool. He looked
down at the quivering
little man and said,
"It's my dog.
Why?"
"Well,"
squeaked the little man
very nervously, "I
believe my dog just
killed it, sir."
"What?"
roared the big man in
disbelief. "What in
the hell kind of dog do
you have?"
"Sir,"
answered the little man,
"It's a
four-week-old
puppy."
"Bull!"
roared the biker,
"How could your
puppy kill my
Doberman?"
"It
appears that he choked
on it, sir."
A
Biker walks into a bar,
he takes a seat at the
bar and growls:
"Bartender!
Get me a drink!"
The bartender obliges,
and the biker scarfs
down the drink. Slamming
the glass down on the
bar, he growls:
"Bartender!
Get me another!"
The bartender pours him
another drink. After a
few more rounds, the
bartender attempts some
conversation:
"Sir,
he says, it seems that
you're visibly upset.
What's the
problem?" The biker
looks at him and snorts:
"I
just went home and
caught my ol' lady
screwing my best
friend!"
"Oh
man," says the
bartender, that's
rough... "What did
you do?" The biker
says:
"Well,
I grabbed her by the
hair, threw her out
nekkid, threw her
clothes out after her,
and told her never EVER
to come back."
"Wow,"
says the bartender in
awe: "That's tough
man, what did you do to
your friend?"
"Well,"
says the biker, "I
marched right back
upstairs, I grabbed HIM
by the scruff of the
neck, and I said: BAD
DOG."
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